Afternoon Baseball

ESPN.com
WWTDD

The first is about figure skating's Buffalo Bills, Sasha Cohen. I would say Peyton Manning, but Cohen's now won silver thrice (2004-05 worlds, '06 Olys), and second would be a step up for Manning.
Of course, I haven't watched any of the Olympics, but you really don't have to watch anything anymore. Just follow the plotlines online in a brief summary, and you're there. What I've done for years with "American Idol," "Survivor," and "24" (except for season 2), three shows I've never watched.

What amazed me about the Cohen coverage was how in every news article, purportedly without opinion, it was like her first name was sassy. Sassy Sasha Cohen. I just searched that exact phrase (not in quotes, although there's 75 sources for that) on Google News, and there's 314 references.

EDIT: Mike e-mailed me very quickly about this, almost as if I had pictures of Mandy Moore, with a clutch photo of the NY Daily News after Sasha was leading after the short program. I think you can guess the headline. She is kinda sassy looking in that photo, though.

An AP story carried by numerous sites says, "Sassy Sasha Cohen saved the best for last. And boy was it good."
Wow. Why not just call her a good whore?

Later in that same story: "The U.S. figure skating champion dazzled the judges with a sassy, sensational short program," and "Cohen will need to be just as dynamic and sassy..." (referring to her leading after the short program)
The Houston Chronicle (again, maybe an AP story), said, "Cohen did not look like the same, sassy Sasha..."
The New York Times, said after the short program, "Sasha Cohen's former coach said she knew the instant she saw Cohen strike a sassy, confident pose..."
There was another AP story headlined by the Henderson Gleaner as, "Sassy Sasha is sensational." with the lead, "Sassy, saucy and supremely confident, Sasha Cohen is not longer in anyone else's shadow."
A columnist says, "Our Sasha was a flirt, both sweet and sassy."

With real stories like that being written, it makes this SportsPickle.com parody seem, well, like just another story.

The second link is just to show how crazy Tom Cruise still is and how terrible Katie Holmes looks. My God, I didn't know she was 40 already.